Long Stay In Jail For Longhurst

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Long Stay In Jail For Longhurst

Tony Longhurst of Dartford, Kent, has been sentenced to a year in jail for unnecessary swearing. Tony, aged 65, had downed 3 pints of strong cider at the Dartford festival, before making his way to the Social Club, where he had a further 6 pints of Strongbow. He did eat a cheese and onion roll, but became abusive after complaining that the onion wasn't as strong as the week before, and the cheese wasn't as thickly sliced as usual. He also accused the bar staff on skipping one of his songs on the jukebox, and got especially angry and irate, when his wife Rita said it was his turn to make the Roast dinner that weekend. We won't mention the word he used on at least 97 occasions, but it begins with C and ends with T, is four letters long.....you get the picture. Tony's sentence is suspended as long as he accepts being a home helper for Dennis for the next year - an offer he is thinking about. He has until tomorrow evening to make his decision.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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